Mawage

Gun’s Quote-of-the-Week:

“Mawage. Mawage is wot bwings us togeder tooday. Mawage, that bwessed awangment, that dweam wifin a dweam...”

-The Impressive Clergyman (From The Princess Bride)

This past weekend, my brother, Erik, got married. My other brother, Alan, and I were his Best Men. Below is my Best Man Speech:

Good evening everyone and welcome. On behalf of the Schrader, Schwinn and Garcia families I want to thank you for spending your time today celebrating this very special occasion with Erik, Jo and all of the friends and family present at our family barn, the Schwinn Produce Farm Barn.

My name is Gary Schrader, and I have the misfortune of being Erik's oldest brother and the honor of being his co-Best Man, former landlord and bona-fide pain-in-the-butt.

Now, I want to let you all know immediately that there is more logic in this decision than meets the eye. When Erik asked Alan and me to be his Best Men, he told us that he didn't trust Alan with the speech or me with the Bachelor Party. This infallible logic proves that Erik is wiser than he looks. This logic is further exemplified by the fact that he married Jo, who is the most beautiful woman in the barn right now.

For the longest time, I didn't exactly believe he was the brightest Crayon in the box. Our relationship hasn't been the most stereotypical, brotherly relationship that you hear about where your older brother picks a fight to defend you, lies to your parents to get you out of trouble, teaches you how to throw a ball or ask a girl out. Those of you who know either of us very well at all know that NONE of those things transpired between the two of us, mostly because I knew nothing about them. Further, our childhood is laced with times when the two of us didn't speak. Period.

There was the time that he scribbled, with a permanent ink pen, all over a 4th grade art project I created and was hanging in the stairwell of the house. There was the time I hit him over the head with a plastic shovel. There was the time he took a pocket knife to my prized bike. There was the time I decided to wreck his bedroom. Twice. The only men I have ever punched, kicked, bit and choked were my brothers and Erik got most of my wrath. To be honest, there were several points in our childhood when our relationship was violent and vindictive. Like I said, not stereotypical.

Or maybe it is. I don't know.

In any case, I think that changed after high school when both of us grew in maturity and understood the frailty of life. There was the time I was in Tacoma on internship and he decided to go to the hospital ICU with a life-threatening mononucleosis scare. There was the time that I was in Michigan and suffered from a severe case of Depression which required the intervention of a counselor and several of my friends. Alan was in the midst of some difficult times in life as well and the three of us, for the first time ever, had to turn to each other for support. You learn a lot about people when you lean on them, even when you lived with them for nearly 20 years.

Erik and I lived together longer than that. He needed a place to stay in the City while finishing up college. He needed a job and had no money, so he lived with me and I didn't charge him rent. Like, for a long time. Eventually, I convinced him to join Lifeteen, the youth ministry program that I volunteered for and continue to do so today. He wasn't sure about talking with teenagers or talking about God and was pretty sure he couldn't do both at the same time, but I knew his goofy, funny yet convicted personality and huge heart would fit right in. It did.

It was there he met Jo. Jo was a former teen in the youth group and came back to volunteer as well. Jo and Erik hit it off immediately, their youthful playfulness egging each other on to the point of me getting annoyed. At one point in time I asked Erik if Jo HAD to be over at the house every night of the week. He responded by moving out. I guess we are still brothers after all.

To be honest, I miss the both of them annoying me. Sometimes. While their watching Spongeball Squarepants daily put my nerves to the test, I was always invited to eat when Jo made some delicious meal in the kitchen. As much as I never understood why they did what they did together, I understood that Christ was the center of it. They prayed together. Daily. I don't mean a Hail Mary or an Our Father... I mean that they prayed together daily that God would reveal to them His plan for their lives. They would pray for their intentions. I caught them more than once praying for me. Their prayer would continue like this for an hour or more. Every day. Trust me, I was there. I was lying in bed when Erik and Jo were in Erik's bedroom as they would process through their litanies. (Full disclosure: The walls are pretty thin in my house.) This was a relationship that was based not on childish TV shows, goofy jokes or inappropriate physical intimacy. No, this is a relationship that is built on Christ, His Church and His plan for their lives. They simply chose to humbly follow that plan, which lead all of us here today.

Advice, toasts and decrees of good luck don't seem to suffice for this man. He knows more about a good relationship than I do, and he doesn't need luck. Therefore, I shall conclude with prayer, because prayer is how he came to the conclusion that he should get down on one knee and ask his best friend to join him for life. Please raise your glass and join me in prayer:

May the Lord protect and keep you,
in sickness and in health
in prosperity and in adversity
all the days of your life

in your new household
until He calls you home.

AMEN.

…and that’s why it’s a Gun’s Quote!